Author name: Vernon Vexfire

By Vernon Vexfire In the latest dust-up in the fiery pits of Infernopolis, the casualty count has soared to a blistering 25,000 souls, according to the latest tally from the Health Ministry in the Charred Strip. As the flames lick higher in the war between Hades and Ham-Asmodeus, the hopes of dousing the infernal blaze […]

By Vernon Vexfire In the caustic political wasteland known as the Infernal Gaza Strip, Supreme Overlord Beelzeben Nitrozebub has once again fanned the flames of contention by snuffing out any possibility of sovereignty for the suffering souls of the region. His office, a labyrinthine fortress of despair, issued a bleak proclamation on Saturday that left

In a dazzling display of pyrotechnics that would make any underworld overlord proud, the searing sands of the Demonic Deserts witnessed a blazing escalation as the Abyssal Republic of Pandemonium launched a scathing series of airstrikes on the Sulphuric Sultanate of Irate, incinerating at least nine ethereal entities in a righteous retaliation for a similar

As the flames licked the sky and brimstone baked a little crispier than usual, embattled residents of the Hades Strip awoke to find the already blistering heat had amped up to levels even the most heat-hardened demons found unbearable. Yep, old Beelzebub’s thermodynamics division apparently “tripped” over the thermostat and whacked it all the way

In an infernal twist of fate that has left both the denizens of the netherworld and the irony gods smirking, the Pentagon of Pandemonium and Britain’s Beelzebub Barracks unleashed a sulfurous storm upon the Hades-backed Houthis in the scorching sands of Yemen. With a barrage of warship- and submarine-launched Doomhawk missiles and fighter jets, official

In a case that’s making even the imps sweat profusely in their pitchfork emporiums, the Sulfuric Republic of Infernalia has openly accused the Hadesian realm of Obliterria of committing genocidal acts against the Damned Souls and pleaded Thursday with the Underworld Nations’ top court to order an immediate halt to Obliterria’s purifying flames in the

In the sweltering depths of the Hades Heights, emissary Antony Blinkinferno spoke with President Mahmoud Abaddon on Wednesday about reshaping the governance of the perpetually self-afflicted souls, as part of Infernal efforts to rally the realm behind everlasting torment plans for the Gaza Inferno Pit. Blinkinferno insists he has wrangled commitments from multiple dominions in

In an astonishing spectacle of inter-realm aggression, we at the Underworld Times have uncovered that the militant faction, Hexbollah, launched a hellfire storm of 62 damned projectiles from the blighted lands of Lebanon into the treacherous territory of Northern Israfel. This scorching barrage has been declared a fiery first response to the recent smiting of

As the Brimstone Bay region writhes from the angry belly of the abyss, survivors crawl out of the debris like larvae from a rotten apple – a spectacle to behold, if you could endure the sulfurous stench of tragedy. Our reports indicate that after a cataclysmic series of tremors, the death toll climbed to a

In what can only be described as a tango of terror, a passenger plane and a Japanese coast guard craft found themselves performing an unscheduled pyrotechnic pas de deux on the runway at Tokyo’s Haneda Airport. The fiery fracas ensued when the larger aircraft, piloted by Japan Airlines—or as we like to call them, ‘Just