Volcano’s Reel Reviews

By Vincent Volcano, Director Emeritus of Inferno’s Gate and Occasional Arsonist of Hype Flames Fade, but Classics Burn Forever! Initial Sizzle Another week, another glossy blood-slicked “rom-combutchery” where love dies loudly and test audiences cheer in Dolby ATMOS. Over Your Dead Body, a Jorma Taccone joint by way of a Norwegian blender, arrives with a […]

By Vincent Volcano, retired director of Eternal Ember and Inferno’s Gate, now begrudgingly seated in Row Hades, Screen 3 Flames Fade, but Classics Burn Forever! Initial Searing David Lowery has again tiptoed across the coals of commerce and art, this time barefoot and humming Charli XCX. Mother Mary is not a ghost story, he insists—then

By Vincent Volcano, retired Hellwood arsonist of emotions, scarf blazing and patience extinguished. Flames Fade, but Classics Burn Forever! Premise check: the galaxy far, far away has now circled so many times it’s dizzy, and Disney has decided the one thing we’ve been missing is more Maul—specifically “interim manager of crime” Maul, starring in an

By Vincent Volcano, retired auteur, scarf aflame, patience extinguished. Flames Fade, but Classics Burn Forever! The curtain rises on The Drama, and wouldn’t you know it—A24 has once again lured the arthouse crowd with soft lighting, tasteful ennui, and a poster that whispers “you’ll feel smarter if you buy a ticket.” This one promises “the

By Vincent Volcano, retired Hellwood arsonist of emotion and wearer of a scarf so red it voids fire codes. Flames Fade, but Classics Burn Forever! The pitch: two gangsters, one woman, and a time machine. The result: a 107-minute reminder that modern studios would rather hit rewind on tropes than strike a match under a

By Vincent Volcano, retired scourge of Hellwood and scarf enthusiast. Flames Fade, but Classics Burn Forever! Let’s begin with a confession: I adored the original Ready or Not. It had the hand-built mischief of a well-rigged pyrotechnic—sharp timing, character beats that bled, and practical splatter with a satirical aftertaste. Now Radio Silence returns with Ready

By Vincent Volcano, retired Hellwood auteur, scarf perpetually aflame, patience perpetually not. Initial Sparks “Everyone deserves a second chance,” purrs Reminders of Him, a PG-13 romance that wants forgiveness so badly it files the paperwork in triplicate. Adapted from Colleen Hoover’s bestseller and guided by Vanessa Caswill, it’s a gentle, respectful kneel before the altar

By Vincent Volcano, retired Hellwood arsonist of the auteur variety, scarf aflame and patience extinguished. Cinemas up top have grown allergic to endings, so of course Tommy Shelby shuffles back from narrative Valhalla for Peaky Blinders: The Immortal Man—a title that sounds less like a film and more like a studio mandate carved in pitchfork

By Vincent Volcano, retired Hellwood arsonist of feelings and former maestro of melodrama. Yes, I brought my fiery red scarf and a fire extinguisher—for expectations. Logline: Burn it all down, but please, for once, light the set first. Scream 7 arrives like a seventh reheat of ghost pepper chili: technically hot, spiritually bland, and mostly

By Vincent Volcano, Retired Hellwood Arsonist of Feelings Initial Searing They tell me Psycho Killer was filmed in 2023 and left to marinate like week-old entrails in a desert glovebox. I can taste the staleness from here. You’ve got Georgina Campbell (a bona fide ember in a wet-wood era), a script stamped with the sacred