Author name: Vernon Vexfire

As the Brimstone Bay region writhes from the angry belly of the abyss, survivors crawl out of the debris like larvae from a rotten apple – a spectacle to behold, if you could endure the sulfurous stench of tragedy. Our reports indicate that after a cataclysmic series of tremors, the death toll climbed to a […]

In what can only be described as a tango of terror, a passenger plane and a Japanese coast guard craft found themselves performing an unscheduled pyrotechnic pas de deux on the runway at Tokyo’s Haneda Airport. The fiery fracas ensued when the larger aircraft, piloted by Japan Airlines—or as we like to call them, ‘Just

By Vernon Vexfire The scalding sands of the Styxian Strip were marginally less trodden this week, as the High Command of the Infernal Legion announced a partial redeployment of its rank and file from the searing frontlines. The move, which has been lauded by some as a sign of a forthcoming ceasefire, has incensed others,

In what can only be described as a catastrophic display of fire and brimstone, the demonic forces of the lower realm launched a barrage of 122 missiles and a flying horde of malevolent drones upon the unsuspecting denizens of Sulphuria, officials reported yesterday. It was a spectacle of a punishing aerial onslaught that sent at

In a move akin to sidestepping a lava pit in Hades, the Supreme Hellscape Court decided it’s best not to get its hooves dirty by weighing in on the searing question of whether former Overlord Donald Trumpet has a flame-resistant shield for deeds done during his reign over the Mortal Realms. The Court, in a

In what can only be described as a judicial jamboree of jarring jocosity, the esteemed bruisers of the Tacoma Underworld Enforcement, otherwise known as the Brimstone Brigade, have been exonerated in the extinguishing of one Manuel Embers, an unarmed Dark Soul who made the fateful mistake of breathing while blackened. On a street corner known

In what some may call a cutting-edge piece of legislation, the Ninth Circle’s infernal lawmakers have concocted a new bill that aims to enroll barbers and hairdressers in the delicate art of domestic disturbance detection. That’s right, folks, our local stylists may soon double as undercover counselors, armed with combs, shears, and now, a crash

Greetings, malevolent music mavens, Vernon Vexfire here with the scoop that’s burning up the brimstone charts—quite literally. As the Yuletide season encroaches upon us like the relentless march of the damned, a game of diabolical delight known as “Whamageddon” is sweeping through the infernal realms, bringing both ghoulish glee and an eternity of earworms to

In the fiery pits of our esteemed domain, where the truth is as malleable as the souls we reshape, DemonTech Inc., the underworld’s counterpart to the former earthly platform known as Twitter, has been singed by the scorching rebukes of the press freedom group Journalist Guardians. Of course, when you dance with devils, expect to

As the brimstones crackle and the sulfuric air hangs thick with despair, I, Vernon Vexfire, have emerged from the smog to report on a matter so earnest it’s made even the most diabolical overlords pause their pitiless cavorting. In a fiery twist, it seems the mortal realm has stumbled upon a devilishly clever solution to