Underworld Updates

In the latest drama to sear its way through the hallowed halls of the Perdition Parliament, firebrand legislator Rep. Brimstone Bowman has been censured for what some are calling the most incendiary act of the legislative season: pulling a fire alarm without so much as a spark to justify the uproar. The chamber, notorious for […]

In an unprecedented move that has everyone in the nine circles shaking in their brimstone boots, the notorious Infernal Representative Kevin McChar, often referred to as the “Speaker of the Sulfurous” by those who dared not speak his real title, announced his abrupt departure from the eternal bureaucracy of the Underworld Congress. Sources close to

As the flames of conflict continue to char the brimstone-riddled borders of Purgatory’s outskirts, our Infernal Hosts, led by Grand Marshal Damien Diablos, stormed the wretched hovel of Forsaken Hollow with a level of fiery fury that would make even the most cold-blooded ice demon break into a sweat. Early this morning, one could hear

Ladies, gentlemen, and infernal entities, Vernon Vexfire reporting from the smoldering trenches of Perdition’s Peak, where the Brimstone Bureau, our pride and sorrow, has just issued a mandatory evacuation. The Bureau’s latest endeavor to scorch the competition—literally—means the damned are scampering like sinners on Judgment Day. But with the land already more crowded than a

In the sultry depths of the Boiling Red Sea, pandemonium broke loose, or as we down here like to call it, a Tuesday. Reports from the Pentagon of the Nether Regions indicate that a U.S. warship, the USS Charbroiler, along with a flotilla of commercial vessels, have come under a fiery offensive. The assault, allegedly

As the eternally damned souls braced themselves for a fleeting moment of respite, the scalding winds carried ominous echoes across the Sinful Plains: the ceasefire between the fiery legions has crumbled faster than the resolve of a glutton at a feast of brimstone and ash. Indeed, the Flaming Trenches flickered back to life with an

In an unprecedented display of underworld ethics that has liquid sulfur bubbling with vibrancy, the House of Lying Luminaries has unceremoniously tossed Eternal Deception Specialist Beelzebub Santos out on his forked tail. Yes, you read that right—ethics. It seems even in the depths of the Netherworld, there’s a line you just don’t cross without getting

Flames flickered a tad brighter in the Underworld today as news swept through the sulfurous air that Henry Hadesheimer, the Machiavellian maestro of mortal geopolitics, finally cashed in his chips at the age of 100. Yes, ladies and gents, the puppeteer of the Cold War pantomime and friend to despot and democracy alike has taken

Down in the smoldering expanses of the Abyssal Plains, it appears that the long-standing feud between the Hellish High Council and the fiendish fanatics of the Sulphur Sect may be taking a turn toward the tepid. Sources close to the situation report that more of the poor souls ensnared in the eternal conflict may soon

By Vernon Vexfire In what’s becoming as tiresome as listening to the Banshee’s wails on karaoke night, the Underworld’s most notorious rival factions, the Brimstone Brigade and the Abyssal Anarchists, have once again extended their so-called “truce” for the fifth circle—er, I mean, day. This comes after an intensive 666-hour negotiation that had all the